Friday, December 7, 2007

lists



i am currently reading a fabulous poetic book called how the blessed live by this fellow vancouverite writer/blogger here. the main character has this lovely habit of writing deliciously rich lists that are chalk-full of meaningful life lessons, reflections and paradoxical states-of-mind. i have decided to make my own list of pet peeves which will be reflective of nothing mentioned above but will please me on a listless friday afternoon when, of course, i should be working...

i) when stores are obviously closed and they leave their blinking open signs on. i always think, "oh, they're open late" and then am crushed when i cannot, in fact, get my keys cut in an hour at midnight.

ii) amateur porn. really? must you? stop it.

iii) cat fur tumbleweeds in my apartment that even a swiffer can't wrangle.

iv) being sweaty and cold at the same time (this happens less since moving to the westcoast but it happened in o-town all the time. it's the second coldest capital after moscow, don't-cha-know?).

v) that you can't eat poutine for breakfast, lunch, and dinner without adverse health affects.

vi) sickness of any kind. after two flus, one pukey and one not last winter, i am officially a germaphobe.

vii) roman numerals.

viii) boring research.

viiii) people that don't like christmas. this, my friends, is virtually unimaginable.

x) not having a cellphone for the two times a year i need it.

xi) wearing tights. it's a faulty crotch thing. i seriously believe it can't be helped. or they would fix it, no?

xii) high heels. wanna love 'em and wear 'em. can't. or won't. you choose.

xiii) anything with eggplant. the word moussaka makes me throw up in my mouth a little.

xiv) any movie with nicole kidman (save for moulin rouge but that is ONLY because ewan macgregor saves the day).

xv) roman numerals - really, what is up with these?

xvi) plane travel. i always get stuck in the middle seat.

xvii) how i can never go to the theatre and smell popcorn and not eat it.

xviii) being late. which i'm gonna be if i don't stop blogging!

thanks for indulging me. i feel better now.

6 comments:

Shells said...

I think I just wet my pants. I'm sure the inner me did, in any case. When I was young I used to wear my underwear on the outside of my tights. Don't tell anyone! ;)

jacks said...

i used to go sans panties under tights cause apparently that is how the nine year old me rolled. but don't tell anyone that either. seriously.

Shells said...

It'll be out little secret. ;)

t_moore8 said...

I think people who invite you to read their blogs but then their blog isn't any good are my new pet peeve :P Just kidding...but the post section of your blog seems to be pretty spicy with all these discussions about panties..."did your mother leave your panties all laid out for you?"...Hopefully you get this seinfeld reference... :P

jacks said...

how could you say that all this gold isn't good Tom? damn you! ;) remind me: is that what jerry says to a woman who wants him to talk dirty to her and then she got all turned off because she thought it was icky? ah, seinfeld. it brought us together as friends and keeps us together. sweet, sweet television...

t_moore8 said...

It totally was the "dirty talker" episode...classic seinfeld episode...ahh Seinfeld...